“Why should life be ennobled? Tell me that, first of all. And, secondly, one doesn’t want disciples. Men like Lande are born so. Christ was splendid; Christians, however, are but a sorry crew. The idea of his doctrine was a beautiful one, but they have made of it a lifeless dogma.”
Tired with talking, Sanine said no more. Soloveitchik remained silent also. There was great stillness around them, while overhead the stars seemed to maintain a conversation wordless and unending. Then Soloveitchik suddenly whispered something that sounded so weird that Sanine, shuddering, exclaimed:
“Tell me,” muttered Soloveitchik, “tell me what you think. Suppose a man can’t see his way clear, but is always thinking and worrying, as everything only perplexes and terrifies him—tell me, wouldn’t it be better for him to die?”
“Well,” replied Sanine, who clearly read the other’s thoughts, “perhaps death in that case would be better. Thinking and worrying are of no avail. He only ought to live who finds joy in living; but for him who suffers, death is best.”
“That is what I thought, too,” exclaimed Soloveitchik, and he excitedly grasped Sanine’s hand. His face looked ghastly in the gloom; his eyes were like two black holes.
“You are a dead man,” said Sanine with inward apprehension, as he rose to go; “and for a dead man the best place is the grave. Good-bye.”
Soloveitchik apparently did not hear him, but sat there motionless. Sanine waited for a while and then slowly walked away. At the gate he stopped to listen, but could hear nothing. Soloveitchik’s figure looked blurred and indistinct in the darkness. Sanine, as if in response to a strange presentiment, said to himself:
“After all, it comes to the same thing whether he lives on like this or dies. If it’s not to-day, then it will be to-morrow.” He turned sharply round; the gate creaked on its hinges, and he found himself in the street.
On reaching the boulevard he heard, at a distance, some one running along and sobbing as if in great distress. Sanine stood still. Out of the gloom a figure emerged, and rapidly approached him. Again Sanine felt a sinister presentiment.
The figure stopped for a moment, and Sanine was confronted by a soldier whose dull face showed great distress.