Youngster after youngster presented his qualifications for the post; and the matter was still undecided when the son of the owner of the ball-field stood up. He was a small, snub-nosed lad, with a plentiful supply of freckles, but he glanced about him with a dignified air of controlling the situation.
"I'm going to be captain this year," he announced convincingly, "or else Father's old bull is going to be turned into the field."
He was elected unanimously.--_Fenimore Martin_.
I consider biennial elections as a security that the sober second thought of the people shall be law.--_Fisher Ames_.
In school a boy was asked this question in physics: "What is the difference between lightning and electricity?"
And he answered: "Well, you don't have to pay for lightning."
A young gentleman was spending the week-end at little Willie's cottage at Atlantic City, and on Sunday evening after dinner, there being a scarcity of chairs on the crowded piazza, the young gentleman took Willie on his lap.
Then, during a pause in the conversation, little Willie looked up at the young gentleman and piped:
The late Charles Coghlan was a man of great wit and resource. When he was living in London, his wife started for an out-of-town visit. For some reason she found it necessary to return home, and on her way thither she saw her husband step out of a cab and hand a lady from it. Mrs. Coghlan confronted the pair. The actor was equal to the situation.
"My dear," he said to his wife, "allow me to present Miss Blank. Mrs. Coghlan, Miss Blank."
The two bowed coldly while Coghlan quickly added:
"I know you ladies have ever so many things you want to say to each other, so I will ask to be excused."
He lifted his hat, stepped into the cab, and was whirled away.
The evening callers were chatting gaily with the Kinterbys when a patter of little feet was heard from the head of the stairs. Mrs. Kinterby raised her hand, warning the others to silence.
"Hush!" she said, softly. "The children are going to deliver their 'good-night' message. It always gives me a feeling of reverence to hear them--they are so much nearer the Creator than we are, and they speak the love that is in their little hearts never so fully as when the dark has come. Listen!"