“You needn’t go 300 miles for that, you can get good seasides to Jonesville for 75 cents. Tirzah Ann, Josiah’s girl by his first wife, got one for that. I don’t wear hats myself, except,” says I with dignity, “in the cause of Right and for the good of the Human Race. And as for seein’ bathin’, I myself would go the other way, ruther than foller it up; howsumever everybody to thier own taste.” But I kep’ thinkin’ of it, and I couldn’t help breakin’ out agin, and speakin’ my mind; says I, in a good deal colder accents, “I would as soon go to a horse race--and sooner,” for the more I thought of it the more I thought that no virtuous woman would start off 300 miles to see bathin’ goin’ on. I acted offish after that, and was sorry I had give her the caraway.
Her face looked red, and she started up and went back and sot doun by some of her mates, and I was glad she did. She pretended to be a laughin’, and she was talkin’ to ’em awful busy; but I see one eye was on me the most of the time--she felt guilty.
At the very next station house two fellers come in that everybody seemed to be lookin’ at, and payin’ attention to. But they didn’t seem to mind it. They come in and sot doun right in the seat between me and Betsey.
After they had sot doun, one of ’em took a cigar out of his pocket, and put it in his mouth. It wasn’t lit, but he held it between his teeth as if it was a great comfort to him. Thinks’es I, it is kinder queer works, but I can stand it if the R. R. Company can. But Betsey leaned her head back, and says to him,
“Was you aware, kind sir, that cigars was confiscated on the cars?”
He didn’t say a word, but held on to it with his teeth as if it was dreadful comfortin’ to him. And she asked him over again. But not a word did he say. I guess she asked him five times--but not a word did she get out of him. And then she turned to the feller with him, the smilin’ chap, and says she,
“Oh no,” says he, “he has got ears,” and agin he smiled.
Thinks’es I, it is pretty queer works, but it is none of my business. I guess we had rode nigh on to an hour in jest that way, Betsey kinder oneasy and nestlin’ round, I calm and placid in demeaniour and one of the men between us a holdin’ that cigar in his mouth, as if it was indeed consolin’, and the other one a smilin’ blandly, at nothin’ in particular. Everybody in the cars seemed to be a lookin’ at ’em, and thinks’es I, it is no wonder, for of all the good natured lookin’ men I ever see, he is the cap sheaf. Thinks’es I, I wish every ticket agent in the world could have his benine face to hang up before ’em, for a sampler, for if there was ever a race that had the appearance of bein’ brought up on vinegar and ten-penny nails, it is them.