MRS. C. Such, Marmy, was my married life for twenty years. Anxious, therefore, that Caroline should escape my wretched fate, I resolved to find her a husband who, like herself, had never enjoyed what is called "Life."
MRS. C. I did; every enquiry I made about you convinced me you were the very man I was looking for. "He is no second Carver," said I, "he is not satiated with the pleasures, the gaieties, the amusements of the world," said I, "he has never even tasted them," said I, "and therefore," said I, "he'll be the more ready to plunge headlong into the dazzling and intoxicating scene before him," said I.
MRS. C. Yes! "Caroline will plunge in with him," said I, "and I--I shall plunge in after both of them," said I.
MRS. C. Of course! (_with increasing animation_) Haven't I to make up the twenty years I lost with Carver? yes, and what's more, I mean to make them up! Yes, Marmy! balls, concerts, operas, assemblies, masquerades, regattas, races!--wherever you are, there will I be! Wherever you go, there will I go. Oh, how I long to begin! how I pant to mingle in "the gay, the gay, the festive scenes--the halls, the halls of dazzling light," and sport the light fantastic toe in the merry, joyous dance! (_dancing a few steps_)
WOOD. (_after a stare of astonishment_) Dance? a woman of her substance! she couldn't do it! (_aloud_) I'm only afraid, my very dear Mrs. Carver, that "light fantastic toe" of yours won't have much to do in our quiet little town of Stow-on-the-Wold!
MRS. C. Stow-on-the-Wold? Faugh! I'm speaking of London!
MRS. C. Yes! Where we shall be this very evening. Yes, Marmy, that's the little agreeable surprise we had in store for you, ha, ha, ha!
WOOD. (_aside_) Now, Woodcock, prove yourself a man, Woodcock--assert your dignity, Woodcock--and let Carver see you're not going to stand any of Carver's nonsense, Woodcock! (_aloud and drawing himself up_) Mrs. Lieutenant Colonel Carver--(_thrusting his hand in his waistcoat, the paper parcel shews itself below it--WOODCOCK hastily thrusts it up again_) I repeat, Mrs. Lieutenant Colonel Carver----
MRS. C. I know what you are going to say, Marmy, but don't be alarmed! we've settled everything without you--in short, you'll have nothing whatever to do except to supply the money--there!