I have barely any thoughts for any thing else; and the Opposition seems to me to have been more wrong in its country’s interest, and to have done her a greater harm than can ever be redressed. It is a serious, awful moment for Sovereign, country, and Government; and in your position none have to go through what you have--and after all so alone!
I hope your health bears up under the anxiety.
* * * Angeli has arrived, and will begin at once. We thought Ernie and Ella--Victoria is too big, though she is the eldest and ought to be in the picture; she would be too preponderant. Angeli is quite lost in admiration of Aliky and May, who are, I must say myself, such a lovely little pair as one does not often see. He will begin our heads to-morrow. * *
* * * I am but very middling, and leading a very quiet life, which is an absolute necessity. It is so depressing to be like this. But our home life is always pleasant--never dull, however quiet. Only a feeling of weariness and incapacity is in itself a trial.
On the 8th of November Princess Victoria was suddenly attacked with diphtheria. How and where she caught the illness remains unexplained. The Grand Duchess, always so courageous in illness, and fearing none, had, however, always had a great horror of diphtheria. Princess Victoria was at once isolated from her family and the others in the house; but, alas! to no purpose. Princess Alice superintended the nursing, aided by the nurses and the Lady Superintendent of her hospital. The terrible anxiety of the poor mother during that illness is best described by her own telegrams and letters to the Queen.
Victoria has diphtheria since this morning. The fever is high. I am so anxious.
This night my precious Aliky has been taken ill.
This is dreadful! my sweet, precious Aliky so ill! At three this morning Orchie called me, saying she thought the child was feverish; complaining of her throat. I went over to her, looked into her throat, and there were not only spots, but a thick covering on each side of her throat of that horrid white membrane. I got the steam inhaler, with chlorate of potash for her at once, but she was very unhappy, poor little thing. We sent for the doctor, who lives close by, and who saw at once that it was a severe case. We have put her upstairs near Victoria, who is quite convalescent, and have fumigated the nursery to try and spare May and the others. It is a _terrible_ anxiety; it is such an acute, and often fatal, illness. * * * Victoria has been graciously preserved; may God preserve these [the younger ones] also in His mercy! My heart is sore; and I am so anxious.