“I tell you,” said Radley, as though he thought it a joke, “my master’s religion and mine is like the articles in this shop, it is mixed. But what matter? it makes as good a show as any, it serves our purpose, and I really think that the world likes to be taken in. We get on, look respectable, and thrive; what can be better than that?”
“Better to starve—better to struggle up hill all one’s life, beset with difficulties and trials.”
“We’ll leave the starving to you, if you like it; and as for struggling up hill, only fools do that, if they can find an easier way round! Now go to your bed, and rest quiet my lad, and leave me and my conscience to settle our affairs together.”
Startled as from a dream, Mark returned to his attic, disappointed, disgusted, and grieved. “Can a blessing ever rest on this house?” thought he; “can Lowe ever, even in this world, be really a gainer by such awful hypocrisy and deceit? Oh, I have been too little on my guard in this place, I have been a drowsy pilgrim on the way—blessed be God that I am awakened before too late!”
“Fear not the lions, for they are chained, and are placed there for trial of faith where it is; and for the discovery of those that have none: keep in the midst of the path, and no hurt shall come unto thee.”—_Pilgrim’s Progress._
It was long before Mark could get to sleep, and he awoke almost before it was light. He felt a heavy oppression which was new to him, and rose to open the window. The sky was now of that deep exquisite blue which it wears the hour before dawn; the few stars that studded the heavens were growing pale at the approach of morning. The street was perfectly quiet, not a vehicle was moving about, and the sleepy sound of a cock crowing at some distance was the only noise that broke the stillness.
“I feel as though I could not rest,” said Mark, “the sun will rise before long; I will dress myself and go out, and have a quiet time before I am required to work. I have been keeping too little watch over myself lately, I have been too easily contented with the little knowledge to which I have attained. Oh, what if I should have been deceiving myself all the time—if I have never entered the strait gate at all!” Mark had lost for a time that sweet assurance which had afforded him such joy amidst trials.