"Possibly I might. But then, of course, when one is free it is different. Everything is different."
"Free!" murmured Viola, her eyes filling. "I hate to think I am tying you."
"It is not that," I said gently; "one does not want to do the same things, nor care about them."
"You wanted Veronica and didn't have her on my account, I am not going to prevent you doing this. You must go if you want to."
She threw herself into the easy chair with her handkerchief pressed to her mouth. The tears welled up to her eyes and poured down her white face uncontrollably.
"Dearest, dear little girl," I said, drawing her into my arms, "you are upsetting yourself for nothing. I don't want to go, I shan't think of going. I am perfectly happy; you are everything to me."
She leant her soft head against me in silence, sobbing for some seconds.
"Come and have breakfast," I said, stroking her hair gently, "and don't let us think anything more about it. If fifty Suzees were calling me I should not want to go."
Viola dried her eyes and came to the table in silence. We had other letters to open, and we discussed these, and no further reference was made to Suzee then.
Viola looked white and abstracted all day, but it was not till after dinner, when we were taking our coffee on the verandah, that she gave me any clew to her thoughts. Then she said suddenly:
"Trevor, I want you to let me go away from you for a year."
I gazed at her in astonishment. She looked very wretched. All the usual bright colour of her face had fled. Her eyes were large, with the pupils widely dilated in them. There was a determined, fixed expression on the pale lips that frightened me.
"Why?" I said, merely drawing my chair close to hers and putting my arm round her shoulders.
"That is just what I can't tell you," she answered. "Not now. When I come back I will tell you, but I don't want to now. But I have a good reason, one which you will understand when you know it. But do just let me go now as I wish, without questions. I have thought it over so much, and I am sure I am doing the right thing."
"You have thought it over?" I repeated in surprise. "Since when? Since this morning, do you mean?"
"No, long before that. Suzee's letter has only decided me to speak now. I have been meaning to ask you to let me go for some time, only I put it off because I thought you would dislike it so and would feel dull without me. But now, if you let me leave you, you can go to Suzee for a time, and she will amuse and occupy you, and if you want me at the end of the year I will come back."