A Cabman was summoned before the LORD MAYOR-- The report in the _Times_ may be found-- For refusing to take in his carriage a fare, Which to do he was legally bound.
The cab of defendant, complainant averred, That he saw, disengaged, on the stand; And to hire it proposed, but defendant demurred, And declined to accord the demand.
But only to think, now, how gentle, how mild, How pleasant a Cabman can be! As he made the objection, he quietly smiled, And observed that he wanted his Tea.
In the same airy strain and light jocular mood, Which we cannot too highly admire, Did the gentleman not, he politely pursued, That refreshment himself, too, require?
But how shall we ever the sequel relate? This behaviour, so worthy of praise, Procured--it is really distressing to state-- Twenty Shillings--or else Fourteen Days!
POR DON VELASQUEZ CROCKER, UN INGENIO DE ESTA CORTE.
The manuscript of the following "True Discovery of Iximaya," by "a wit of this court" (as the old Spanish dramatists would have said), was brought to _Mr. Punch's_ office, together with three pounds of chocolate and a box of cigars, by an unknown hand. _Mr. Punch_ forgives the mixed jargon of the verses, being moved thereto by the integrity of the chocolate and cigars, which were entirely Spanish; but, as his readers have not tasted of the one, or inhaled the fumes of the other, he has employed three of the best Spanish scholars in the Foreign Office (placed at his disposal by LORD CLARENDON) to prepare the annexed translations of his correspondent's most recondite phrases.
SENOR PUNCH, amigo mio; cuyo sobremucho brio Todo triste enfado rio drives from out the heart of man! JUDITH, cuyo cor aïroso ofiende su esposo! Y TOBIAS, tan jocoso, de los canes Grande Can! Hear a singular narration of a long-lost Aztec nation In a lonely situation dwelling on its ancient plan; I alone have entered into its forbidden lands by dint o' All the wit of MENDEZ PINTO, and the brass of JONATHAN. In the town of Guatemala, sitting in the antesala (That you know's the tap-room parlour) of a queer old Spanish inn, While the portly Mesoñero--platicante el dinero De tan rico forastero through his appetite to win-- Brought from out the meagre larder of his precious poor posada A sabrosa sazonada, mess of beans, in dripping fried; I was mindful of a greasy Padre, very fat and wheezy, Who, with action free and easy, came and sat him by my side; Saying, "Senor por mi vida, if I share your slight comida, It is not because I need a meal, but that I wish to show Mi poquito de respeto por tan principal sujeto." "Tan afable y discreto Padre I am glad to know: You are welcome, father," said I; "my repast, you see is ready, So, if you will bless the bread, I gladly will the half resign." Thus we sat, some white wine sipping, and the pan bendito dipping in the unctuous beans and dripping, till I said, "O! Padre mine, Prithee tell me sin engaños why your old ciudadanos Twixt two large and fierce volcanoes chose to build this lordly town?[2] Uno d'agua rebienta; un con llamas atormenta El Pueblo; both have sent a raging torrent rolling down." "Ah! amigo muy amado!" said the Padre; "ALVARADO Este lugar mas dichado chose betwixt each fatal spout, Thinking that whene'er they brought or floods of fire or streams of water On the town from either quarter, one would put the other out." Then I said, "I've heard men say a town entitled Iximaya, Never seen by white man, lay a few leagues off behind the hills. Is it true, Sir?" Said the Padre, "Por los ojos de mi madre, Vino con los contos cuadre! Talking, dry-lipped, nothing skills. Bring us, quick, some Ratafia and cigars, DOLORES mia; Manana sera otro dia; all to-night we'll merry be. Yo estaba un chiquito (here he took a cigarrito) Algo de lo pastorcito, when its walls I chanced to see: 'Twas from yonder high Sierra's cloud-encircled summit; where a Vagabunda negra perra, which I loved, had gone astray, Sus esplandientes tejas, blancas como mis ovejas, I could see and count the rejas, tho' 'twas twenty leagues away."