But Mr. Mildmay was not in love with Cicely, and it never occurred to him that it might be possible to settle matters in this ordinary and expeditious way.
Mr. Ascott remained behind when Mildmay went away, and with the complacence of a dull man apologised for his young friend's abrupt departure. "He is so shocked about all this, you must excuse his abruptness. It is not that he is without feeling--quite the reverse, I assure you, Cicely. He has felt it all--your poor father's death, and all that has happened. You should have heard him in church on Sunday. He feels for you all very much."
Cicely, still trembling from the sudden touch on her hands, the agitated sound of Mildmay's voice, the sense of sympathy and comprehension which his looks conveyed, took this apology very quietly. She was even conscious of the humour in it. And this digression being over, "her old friend" returned seriously to the question. He repeated, but with much less force, all that Miss Maydew had said. He warned her that she would lose "caste," that, however much her friends might wish to be kind to her, and to treat her exactly as her father's daughter ought to be treated, that she would find all that sort of thing very difficult. "As a governess, of course you would always be known as a lady, and when you met with old friends it would be a mutual pleasure; but the village schoolmistress!" said Mr. Ascott; "I really don't like to mention it to Adelaide, I don't know what she would say."
"She would understand me when she took all into consideration," said Cicely, "I could be then at home, independent, with the little boys."
"Ah, independent, Cicely!" he cried; "now you show the cloven hoof--that is the charm. Independent! What woman can ever be independent? That is your pride; it is just what I expected. An independent woman, Cicely, is an anomaly; men detest the very name of it; and you, who are young, and on your promotion--"
"I must be content with women then," said Cicely, colouring high with something of her old impetuosity; "they will understand me. But, Mr. Ascott, at least, even if you disapprove of me, don't go against me, for I cannot bring up the children in any other way."
"Where?" cried Cicely; "and who would take care of them for the money I could give? They are too young for school; and I have no money for that either. If there is any other way, I cannot see it; do not go against me at least."