Clear consciousness was struggling back now with memory, but not before I had pressed her to me and returned those kisses. She had laid aside her little saffron silk coat, and her breast and arms shone softly through a filmy muslin covering.
I sat up regarding her; very lissom and soft and lovely she looked, and my whole brain swam suddenly with delight.
Surely I could not part with her! She was precious to me in that madness that comes over us at such moments.
I put my arms round her and held her to my breast with all my force in a clasp that must have been painful to her, but she only laughed delightedly.
Then my promise came back to me. It was impossible to break that. What was the good of torturing myself when I had made it impossible to take her. Why had she come here?
"Where is your husband?" I asked mechanically wondering if any strange fate had removed him from between us.
"Oh, I put him to sleep, he will give no trouble. I gave him opium, so much opium, he will sleep a long time."
"You have not killed him?" I said, in a sudden horror.
Her eyes were wide open and full of extraordinary fire, she seemed in those moments capable of anything.
She put up her little hands and ran them through my hair.
"Such black hair," she murmured. "Ah, how I love it! I love black hair. How it shines, how soft it is! I hate grey hair. It is horrid. No, I have not killed him. He will wake again when we have sailed and are far away from Sitka."
These words drove from me the last veil of clinging sleep. I kept my arms round her and said:
"But, Suzee, I can't take you with me. I promised your husband to-night I would not."
"That's nothing," she replied lightly; "promises are nothing when one loves. And you love me, Treevor; you must love me, and I am coming with you, you can't drive me away."
The ship's bells sounded overhead on deck as she spoke. The sound seemed a warning. I knew our ship was due to leave in the morning; I did not know quite when. If it left the quay with the girl on board, the horror of a broken promise would cling to me all my life.
"I can't take you, it is impossible. You must go back and try to forget you have ever seen me. You must go now at once, our ship is leaving soon."