Oh, for some new and lone retreat, nor far away nor near, With lovely sights to charm the eye, soft sounds to soothe the ear; Where vexed and wearied spirits, such as yours and mine, might rest, And find in life new purpose, in its joys unwonted zest;
Some Aidenn, some Elysium of rapturous delight, Where peace should reign unbroken from the dawn to fall of night! Yet since for the impossible in vain we yearn, 'tis clear, It will end no doubt as usual, in "Good old Margate," dear.
Much talked about, but very seldom seen!]
"A railway from Joppa to Jerusalem" sounds like a Scriptural line. In future, "going to Jericho" will not imply social banishment, as the party sent thither will be able to take a return-ticket.
SO NICE AND SYMPATHETIC.--A gentleman, whose one glass eye had served him for years, had the misfortune to drop it. It smashed to atoms. This happened when he was far away in the country. He inquired of a friend where was the nearest place for him to go and get refitted.
"Why don't you call upon the girl you were flirting with all last night?" his friend inquired. "She has a first-class reputation for making eyes."
BALLOONERY.--"We went spinning through the air!" said an enthusiastic aeronaut, describing his recent trial trip.
"Indeed!" observed his companion, meditatively. "Judging by your description it sounds as if you had been in an 'heir-loom' instead of an 'air-ship.'"
AT BRUSSELS.--_Mrs. Trickleby_ (_pointing to an announcement in grocer's window, and spelling it out_). _Jambon d'Yorck._ What's that mean, Mr. T.?
_Mr. T_. (_who is by way of being a linguist_). Why, good Yorkshire preserves, of course. What did you suppose it was--Dundee marmalade?
[Illustration: "CAUTION! THIS HILL IS DANGEROUS!"]
Dear Brown and Jones and Robinson and many thousands more, Now spending dismal holidays on some dank sea-girt shore, You, who affect to pity those compelled in town to stay, Should rather envy us, because we cannot get away.
While you are hiring tiny rooms at many pounds a week, And huddle there and watch parades that run with rain, and reek, Contrast my cheerful aspect with your discontented looks, As here I stay at ease among my pictures and my books.
Here in the trains the traveller can now find ample space, Enjoying elbow-room without a struggle for a place: The choicest dishes are not "off" at half-past one to lunch, And no one spoils our appetite with--"After you with _Punch_!"