There is a little poem by Dean Swift, published by him in Dublin, in 1728, and reprinted in London, in 1729. Its price was only fourpence, and it is called, ‘The Journal of a Modern Lady, in a Letter to a Person of Quality.’ It is so small, that it is absolutely lost in the Dean’s voluminous works, yet it is very amusing, and, as far as I can judge (having made an especial study of the Social Life of the Eighteenth Century), it is not at all exaggerated; and for this reason I have ventured to reproduce it. It is borne out in similar descriptions both in the early and latter portions of the century; as, for instance, in ‘The English Lady’s Catechism,’ 1703, of which the following is a portion:
‘I lie in Bed till Noon, dress all the Afternoon, Dine in the Evening, and Play at Cards till Midnight.’
‘Twice a year or oftener, according as my Husband gives me new Cloaths.’
‘Why do you go to Church when you have new Cloaths?’
‘To see other People’s Finery, and to show my own, and to laugh at those scurvy, out-of-fashion Creatures that come there for Devotion.’
‘I read lewd Plays and winning Romances.’
‘Why, because I am an English lady, and they are Foreign Creatures: my Page from Genoa, my Monkey from the East Indies, and my Lap Dog from Vigo.’
‘Would they not have pleased you as well if they had been English?’
‘No, for I hate everything that Old England brings forth, except it be the temper of an English Husband, and the liberty of an English Wife. I love the French Bread, French Wines, French Sauces, and a French Cook; in short, I have all about me French or Foreign, from my Waiting Woman to my Parrot.’
‘Some with money, and some with fair promises. I seldom pay anybody’s bills, but run more into their debt. I give poor Tradesmen ill words, and the rich I treat civilly, in hopes to get further in their debt.’
Addison, in the _Spectator_ (No. 323, March 11th, 1712), gives Clarinda’s Journal for a week, from which I will only extract one day as a sample.
‘WEDNESDAY. _From Eight to Ten._ Drank two Dishes of Chocolate in Bed, and fell asleep after ’em.
‘_From Ten to Eleven._ Eat a Slice of Bread and Butter, drank a Dish of Bohea, read the _Spectator_.
‘_From Eleven to One._ At my Toilet, try’d a new Head.[7] Gave orders for _Veney_[8] to be combed and washed. _Mem._ I look best in Blue.