My days were now comparatively cloudless; yet still my youthful tricks had not entirely left me. Some of these frequently led me into scrapes and unpleasant predicaments. The following were among the frolics with which I at this time diverted myself: viz., filling the pipes of my comrades with gunpowder; putting a lighted candle in their hands while asleep, then tickling their noses with a straw; tying their great toes together, then crying out fire; blacking their hands with soot, then tickling their ears and noses, to induce them to scratch themselves, and thus to black their faces all over; putting lighted paper between their toes when asleep; pulling the stools from behind them when in the act of sitting down; sewing their shirts to their bedding when asleep: all these, with fifty more, I regret to say, were in those days my constant delight and practice. These mischievous pranks led me into many a fight, but that did not discourage me. I had a natural propensity to tease people; and, as I did not scruple to indulge it, you may be sure I did not escape without my share of tricks in return. He who plays at fives, says the old proverb, must expect rubbers; and accordingly, one day, when I was sitting upstairs, a hundred voices bawled out, "Pass the word for the fife-major; the adjutant wants him." I bounced down in an instant, and soon found that the whole barrack were in a roar of laughter at my expense; for, to the tail of my coat was attached a large sheet of paper with these words in legible characters, "The Biter Bit." To have evinced any displeasure at this hoax, would only have served to render me more ridiculous, and to increase the hooting and laughter at my expense; so I joined in the laugh, and affected to think it a remarkably good joke.
About this period a circumstance happened which, in some degree, blighted my pride, and almost cooled my military zeal. It was nutting season: I made a party to go, and we arrived at the wood, where the filberts hung as thick as laurels on a soldier's brow. We had not bagged more than a bushel, when we were pounced upon by three keepers, and taken prisoners to the barracks. The three boys who were my companions on this excursion got two dozen stripes; I lost my two as fife-major, and was turned back to my original post as drummer, or rather as fifer. This severe punishment did not arise from the enormity of purloining the nuts, but from the fact of our being found some four miles from the cantonment. Under these circumstances we might have been taken up as deserters, and the keepers have received two pounds each man; so that, upon the whole, we had reason to be grateful that the more serious offence was not urged against us.