All this flashed through her mind as she walked slowly, reluctantly toward the orchard--and with it an annoyance that their pleasant comradeship should end this way. So that when, a little later, a very earnest Peter began to tell her in stumbling, awkward words how much her going must mean to him, she wanted to cry out and beg him to stop.
"Nancy--_I'm_ clumsy as the devil. Don't you _know_ what I want to tell you? I can't let you go without knowing it--and--and--Nancy, _could_ you ever--ever love a fellow--like me--enough--to--want--to marry him?"
Then the woman's heart within her made Nancy ages old.
"Oh, Peter!" she said with tender compassion. She _didn't_ want to hurt this very dear friend!
"I'm not nearly good enough for you, Nancy, but then, _any_ fellow isn't good enough! And, Nancy, there isn't anything in this whole world I wouldn't do--if you cared."
"Oh, Peter!" Why _in_ the world couldn't she say something more, she thought. Why couldn't she stem that flood she knew was coming? Why could she not make him see instantly, how impossible it all was--and say good-bye and go!
"I'll make you happy, Nancy--if loving will do it," he finished humbly.
"Do you mean you don't care--a bit?" he cried, protestingly. "Have I frightened you? You said yourself that living one day up here was like weeks somewhere else! Somehow I've not thought of your going away--ever. You seemed such a part of it here. You're so--different--from all the girls I've known! You're such a--_pal_. That's the kind a man needs!"
Nancy was biting her lip to hide its trembling. Over her swept a reverence for this that Peter Hyde was offering her--she knew that a man's pure soul was being bared before her. His awkward words came slowly because they were born of a deep feeling. She was not worthy!
"Oh, Peter! Peter! Please--I'm--I can't let you say all this! I'm _not_--what you think me! I'm a _cheat_! You'd hate me if----"
He caught her hand. "I know what you are, Nancy--you're the best, truest, straightest-hearted little girl that ever lived!"
With an effort that hurt Nancy pulled herself together. She looked away so that she might not see that it hurt Peter Hyde when she pulled her hand from his close clasp.