Produced by the Mormon Texts Project (http://mormontextsproject.org), with thanks to Steven Fluckiger, Mariah Averett, and Lauren McGuinness.
AUTHOR OF "IN MY INDIAN GARDEN," "UNDER THE PUNKAH," "NOAH'S ARK,'" ETC., ETC.
WITH AUTHOR'S GRATITUDE, TO A FRIEND, JOHN STUART DOWNING.
By the Pennsylvania Limited--Her Majesty's swine--Glimpses of Africa and India--"Eligible sites for Kingdoms"--The Phoenix city--Street scenes--From pig to pork--The Sparrow line--Chicago Mountain--Melancholy merry-makers.
Fathers of Waters--"Rich Lands lie Flat"--The Misery River--Council Bluffs--A "Live" town, sir--Two murders: a contrast--Omaha--The immorality of "writing up"--On the prairies--The modesty of "Wish-ton-Wish"--The antelope's tower of refuge--Out of Nebraska into Colorado--Man-eating Tiger.
The South Park line--Oscar Wilde on sunflowers as food--In a wash-hand basin--Anti-Vigilance Committees--Leadville the city of the carbonates--"Busted" millionaires--The philosophy of thick boots--Colorado miners--National competition in lions--Abuse of the terms "gentleman" and "lady"--Up at the mines--Under the pine-trees.
What is the conductor of a Pullman car?--Cannibalism fatal to lasting friendships--Starving Peter to feed Paul--Connexion between Irish cookery and Parnellism--Americans not smokers--In Denver--"The Queen City of the Plains"--Over the Rockies--Pride in a cow, and what came of it--Sage-brush--Would ostriches pay in the West?--Echo Canyon--The Mormons' fortifications--Great Salt Lake in sight.
Zion--Deseret--A City Of Two Peoples--"Work" the watch-word of Mormonism--A few facts to the credit of the Saints--The text of the Edmunds Bill--In the Mormon Tabernacle--The closing scene of the Conference.
A people under a ban--What the Mormon men think of the Anti-Polygamy Bill--And what the Mormon women say of polygamy--Puzzling confidences--Practical plurality a very dull affair--But theoretically a hedge-hog problem--Matrimonial eccentricities--The fashionable milliner fatal to plurality--Absurdity of comparing Moslem polygamy with Mormon plurality--Are the women of Utah happy?--Their enthusiasm for Women's Rights.
A Special Correspondent's lot--Hypothecated wits--The Daughters of Zion--Their modest demeanour--Under the banner of Woman's Rights--The discoverer discovered--Turning the tables--"By Jove, sir, you shall have mustard with your beefsteak!"