_A._ I do. Like the rest of my work, it shall be all _moonshine_. It shall be done, Barnstaple; but have you not another idea or two to help me with?
_B._ By this time you ought to have some knowledge of gastronomy. Talk seriously about eating.
_B._ Then be seriously affronted--complain to the burgomaster, or mayor, or commandant, whoever it may be--they attempt to bully--you are resolute and firm as an Englishman--insist upon being righted--they must make you a thousand apologies. This will tickle the national vanity, and be read with interest.
_A._ (_writes._) I have been affronted. Anything else which may proceed from your prolific brain, Barnstaple?
_A._ Never complained even of a headache.
_B._ Then do everything but die--Henri weeping and inconsolable--Mouton howling at the foot of your bed--kick the surgeons out of the room--and cure yourself with three dozen of champagne.
_A._ (_writes._) Very sick--cured with three dozen of champagne--I wish the illness would in reality come on, if I were certain of the cure _gratis_. Go on, my dear Barnstaple.
_B._ You may work in an episode here--delirium--lucid intervals--gentle female voice--delicate attentions--mysterious discovery from loquacious landlady--eternal gratitude--but no marriage--an apostrophe--and all the rest left to conjecture.
_A._ (_writes down._) Silent attentions--conjecture--I can manage that, I think.
_B._ By-the-bye, have you brought in Madame de Stael?
_A._ No--how the devil am I to bring her in?
_B._ As most other travellers do, by the head and shoulders. Never mind that, so long as you bring her in.
_A._ (_writes._) Madame de Stael by the shoulders--that's not very polite towards a lady. These hints are invaluable; pray go on.
_B._ Why, you have already more hints this morning than are sufficient for three volumes. But, however, let me see. (_B. thinks a little._) Find yourself short of cash.
_A._ A sad reality, Barnstaple. I shall write this part well, for truth will guide my pen.
_B._ All the better. But to continue--no remittances--awkward position--explain your situation--receive credit to any amount--and compliment your countrymen.
_A._ (_writes._) Credit to any amount--pleasing idea? But I don't exactly perceive the value of this last hint, Barnstaple.