"There, dim in clouds, the poring Scholiasts mark, Wits, who, like owls, see only in the dark; A lumber-house of books in every head; For ever reading, never to be read!"--_Dunciad_.
[7] If the Knight knew the aptness, in its full extent, of his oath, upon this occasion, we must give him more credit for his reading than we are willing to allow to military men of the age in which he flourish'd;--for, observe: he vows to _cudgel_ a man lurking to _rob_ his Lady of her virtue, in a _bower_;--how appropriately, therefore, does he swear by the _God of the Gardens_! who is represented with a kind of _cudgel_ (_falx lignea_) in his right hand; and is, moreover, furnished with another weapon of formidable dimensions, (Horace calls it _Palus_) for the express purpose of annoying _Robbers_.
"_Fures dextra coercet, Obscænoque ruber porrectus ab inguine_ PALUS."
It must be confess'd that the last mention'd attribute of this Deity was stretch'd forth to promote pleasure in some instances, instead of fear;--for it was a sportive custom, in the hilarity of recent marriages, to seat the Bride upon his _Palus_;--but this circumstance by no means disproves its efficacy as a dread to Robbers; on the contrary, that implement must have been peculiarly terrifick, which could sustain the weight of so many Brides, without detriment to its firmness, or elasticity.
[8] There is a terrible jumble in Somnus's family. He was the son of Nox, by Erebus;--and Erebus, according to different accounts, was not only Nox's husband, but her brother,--and even her son, by Chaos;--and Mors was daughter of Somnus, by that devil of a Goddess Nox, the mother of his father and himself!--The heathen Deities held our canonical notions in utter contempt; and must have laugh'd at the idea (which, surely, nobody does now,) of forbidding a man to marry his Grandmother.
[9] _Vide_ Lord Chesterfield's Letters.--This noble Author, by the by, has set his dignified face against risibility. It would be well for us poor devils, who call ourselves Comic Writers, if our efforts were always as successful in raising a _Laugh_ as his Lordship's censure upon it.
[10] I am aware that much has been said, of old, relative to the "_cura boum_," and the "_optuma torvæ forma bovis_;"--but, for a show of cattle, I would back Smithfield, or most of our English market Towns, against any _forum boarium_ of the Romans.