_Mr J._ Let me act as your _budli_ in this and distribute the remaining thousand.
_Mr T._ From what I remember of you as a youth, I cannot wholly rely on your discretion. Rather would I place my confidence in this gentleman.
[_Indicating myself, who turned orange with pleasure._
_Mr J._ Indeed? And how know you that he may not adhere to the entire thousand?
_Mr T._ And if he does, it is no matter, if he is a genuine deserving. I can give the whole to him if I am so minded, and he need not give away a penny of it unless inclined.
[_At which I was fit to dance with delight._
_Mr J._ I deny that you possess the power, seeing that he is a British subject, and as such cannot be styled a "foreigner."
_Mr T._ There you have mooted a knotty point indeed. Alas, that we have no forensic big-wig here to decide it!
_Myself_ (_modestly_). As a native poor student of English law, I venture to think that, by dint of my legal attainments, I shall be enabled to crack the Gordian nut. I am distinctly of opinion that an individual born of dusky parents in a tropical climate _is_ a foreigner, in the eye of British prejudice, and within the meaning of the testator. [_And here I maintained my assertion by a logomachy of such brilliancy and erudition that I completely convinced the minds of both auditors._
_Mr J._ (_grumblingly, to ~Mr TOMKINS~_). Assuming he is correct, why favour _him_ more than _me_?
_Mr T._ Because instinct informs me that a gentleman with such a face as his--however dusky--may be trusted, and with the untold gold!
_Mr J._ (_jealously_). And I am not to be trusted! If you were to hand me your _portemonnaie_ now, full of notes and gold, and let me walk into the street with it, do you doubt that I should return? Speak, TOMKINS!
_Mr T._ Assuredly not; but so, too, would this gentleman. (_To me, as ~Mr JOHNSON~ sneered a doubt._) Here, you, Sir, take this _portemonnaie_ out into the street for five minutes or so, I trust to your honour to return it intact. (_After I had emerged triumphantly from this severe ordeal of my ~bonâ fide~._) Aha, JOHNSON! am I the judge of men or not?
_Mr J._ (_still seeking, as I could see, to undermine me in his friend's favour_). Pish! Who would steal a paltry £50 and lose £1000? If I had so much to give away, I should wish to be sure that the party I was about to endow had corresponding confidence in _me_. Now, though I have always considered you as a dull, I know you to be strictly honest, and would trust you with all I possess. In proof of which, take these two golden sovereigns and few shillings outside. Stay away as long as you desire. You will return, I know you well!