"DEAR PUNCH,--FARADAY was regularly non-plussed by experiments at the Royal Agricultural Meeting at Gloucester. The President, Vice-President, and Honorary Secretary caused to be placed before them a large tub filled with three gallons of cream; the fingers of the three gentlemen were placed upon the rim of the tub, and in about fifteen minutes the cream began to move round until it became _solid Butter_!
If there were any truth in Spirit Rapping, we should be glad if the ghost of any good old British farmer would be so kind as to rap out its ideas on the subject of an agricultural implement, for which a prize has been awarded by the Royal Agricultural Society, and which rejoices in the name of a Dynamometer. Respecting this new-fangled invention, however, it would not, perhaps, be correct to print all the expressions which the worthy but possibly rather prejudiced spirit might "rap out."
TOM DUNCOMBE thanks his stars that the Jews never can come into Parliament, as it will be a matter of impossibility for them to swallow the immense quantity of _gammon_ there is in the House.
A wretched creature who hangs about the _Punch_ Office thrust the following indescribable piece of nonsense under the door:
"When is the weather favourable to Haymaking? When it 'rains pitchforks.'"
There! and yet we pay a police rate of two shillings and twopence in the pound.
Whatever geographers may say, in order that the combined fleets may enter the Dardanelles, they must get out of the Pacific.
[Illustration: EFFECT OF THE CAB STRIKE.--GOING TO THE OPERA IN A WHEELBARROW.]
Pretty Christianth! No war! Dey von't fight after all! Pretty Christianth, nice Christianth, dese nations I call Dey promith'd so fair to cut each others' throatsh, And dey're goin' to thettle de shquabble by notesh!
Not a goin' to fight!--and deir quarrel arose About deir religionth--not comin' to blows! Dere never was Christianth behaved so afore, But who's to depend on 'em now, any more?
Here'th we bin' a goin' and thtockin' our thopth, And what shall we do now wid all dem old thlopth Wid which all our thelvth and our vinders is filled-- No war, nor no actionth, nor no theamen killed?
Vat customers is dere dem vatcheth vill buy, As ve've got for the thailorth--dem vatcheth to fry? Dem jewels, rings, thatins, and thilks, all in store Agin JACK with prizemoney comin' athore?
