Only the _British Medical Journal_. You said I could keep it on.
Yes. All except this. There is an article here----
[_Offers it to him again: he does not take it._
[_With a sigh and a smile._] I have read it all through three times.
[_Rising; peremptorily._] Vera, I don't offer you my work as a _pis aller_. If you wish to go back to your medicine. . . .
Dr. Rheinhardt has definitely forbidden me!
You could win Rheinhardt round in ten minutes. The point is--do you wish it?
[_Dispiritedly._] Oh, no; I want only to serve you. When you first spoke of making me your secretary, it came to me like a ray of sunlight.
No. I always felt a sort of doubt and fear of things when I depended on myself; and now that is all gone.
You don't feel at home in my world yet; naturally.
I think I do. It is so restful to have you to guide me and judge for me. Only I do enjoy this old thing--[_showing the_ B. M. J.]--and it takes very little time.
It is not a question of time; it is a question of divided allegiance.
I will give it up it you think right, father.
No, not just yet. Here are three more letters. [_Hands them to her._] Decline that. Agree to that. Tell the Deputation to come on the 15th at 10 A.M.
Also write out a telegram. [_Looks at her and pauses._] No; that is all. Take them upstairs; I may want to dictate something.
[_Exit_ VERA. CARLYON _sits again_. ELIZABETH, _who has approached from the veranda, looks at_ CARLYON _questioningly_.
Well, Elizabeth? [_Not looking up, absently._
[_Standing above him._] Aren't you hard upon her? She did so love her medicine! And she has hardly any of her old light-heartedness left.
She has got some, and I shall have to take that away. Do you know, Elizabeth, you were light-hearted once?
Precisely, except that she'll be cleverer. I suppose you are happy enough at the end of the process?
Oh, _I_ am happy if only I can satisfy you. But she will never quite give herself up.
Oh yes, she will! Why, already she follows without question every word I speak!
[_Coming round in front of him._] Every spoken word, I should hope so! But what about your unspoken thoughts and feelings? Oh, you _know_ she will never be like me. Can you bring _her_ in from another room by wishing for her? Does _she_ come in smiling if you are glad, and sad if you are angry? [CARLYON _shrugs his shoulders_.] Has there ever been any one but me like that?