ADVICE TO NEWLY MARRIED COUPLES.
1. "BE YE FRUITFUL AND MULTIPLY" is a Bible commandment which the
children of men habitually obey. However they may disagree on other
subjects, all are in accord on this; the barbarous, the civilized, the
high, the low, the fierce, the gentle—all unite in the desire which
finds its accomplishment in the reproduction of their kind. Who shall
quarrel with the Divinely implanted instinct, or declare it to be
vulgar or unmentionable? It is during the period of the honeymoon that
the intensity of this desire, coupled with the greatest curiosity, is
at its height, and the unbridled license often given the passions at
this time is attended with the most dangerous consequences.
2. CONSUMMATION OF MARRIAGE.—The first time that the husband and wife
cohabit together after the ceremony has been performed is called the
consummation of marriage. Many grave errors have been committed by
people in this, when one or both of the contracting parties were
not physically or sexually in a condition to carry out the marriage
relation. A marriage, however, is complete without this in the eyes
of the law, as it is a maxim taken from the Roman civil statutes that
consent, not cohabitation, is the binding element in the ceremony. Yet, in most States of the U.S., and in some other countries, marriage is legally declared void and of no effect where it is not possible to consummate the marriage relation. A divorce may be obtained provided the injured party begins the suit.
3. TEST OF VIRGINITY.—The consummation of marriage with a virgin is
not necessarily attended with a flow of blood, and the absence of this
sign is not the slightest presumption against her former chastity. The true test of virginity is modesty void of any disagreeable familiarity. A sincere Christian faith is one of the best recommendations.
4. LET EVERY MAN REMEMBER that the legal right of marriage does not
carry with it the moral right to injure for life the loving companion
he has chosen. Ignorance may be the cause, but every man before
he marries should know something of the physiology and the laws of
health, and we here give some information which is of very great
importance to every newly-married man.
5. SENSUALITY.—Lust crucifies love. The young sensual husband is
generally at fault. Passion sways and the duty to bride and wife is
not thought of, and so a modest young wife is often actually forced
and assaulted by the unsympathetic haste of her husband. An amorous
man in that way soon destroys his own love, and thus is laid the
foundation for many difficulties that soon develop trouble and disturb
the happiness of both.
6. ABUSE AFTER MARRIAGE.—Usually marriage is consummated within a day
or two after the ceremony, but this is gross injustice to the bride. In most cases she is nervous, timid, and exhausted by the duties of preparation for the wedding, and in no way in a condition, either in body or mind, for the vital change which the married relation bring upon her. Many a young husband often lays the foundation of many diseases of the womb and of the nervous system in gratifying his unchecked passions without a proper regard for his wife's exhausted condition.
7. THE FIRST CONJUGAL APPROACHES are usually painful to the new wife, and no enjoyment to her follows. Great caution and kindness should be exercised. A young couple rushing together in their animal passion soon produce a nervous and irritating condition which ere long brings apathy, indifference, if not dislike. True love and a high regard for each other will temper passion into moderation.
8. WERE THE ABOVE INJUNCTIONS HEEDED fully and literally it would
be folly to say more, but this would be omitting all account of the
bridegroom's new position, the power of his passion, and the timidity
of the fair creature who is wondering what fate has in store for her
trembling modesty. To be sure, there are some women who are possessed
of more forward natures and stronger desires than others. In such
cases there may be less trouble.