PIRATE CHIEF (with another bow). Charmed!
JILL (politely). Don't mention it, Commodore.
OLIVER. My sister wants to marry you. Er--carry on. (He moves a little away from them and lies down.)
JILL (sitting down and indicating a place beside her). Won't you sit down, Commodore?
PIRATE CHIEF. Thank you, madam. The other side if I may. I shall hear better if you condescend to accept me. (He sits down on the other side of her.)
JILL. Oh, I'm so sorry! I was forgetting about your ear.
PIRATE CHIEF. Don't mention it. A little discussion in the La Plata river with a Spanish gentleman. At the end of it I was an ear short and he was a head short. It was considered in the family that I had won.
PIRATE CHIEF. Madam, I am not a marrying man, not to any extent, but if you would care to be Mrs. Crookshank, I'd undertake on my part to have the deck swabbed every morning, and to put a polish on the four-pounder that you could see your pretty face in.
JILL. Eric, how sweet of you. But I think you must speak to my brother in the library first. Oli-ver!
JILL. It's all settled, Oliver, between Eric and myself, but you will want to ask him about his prospects, won't you?
PIRATE. I shall be very glad to tell you anything I can, sir. I think I may say that I am doing fairly well in my profession.
OLIVER. What's your ship? A sloop or a frigate?
JILL (excited). Oh, that's what Oliver puts on his hair when he goes to a party.
OLIVER (annoyed). Shut up, Jill! A brigantine? Ah yes, a rakish craft, eh, Commodore?
OLIVER. And how many pieces of eight have you?
OLIVER. Ah! (To JILL) What's nine times eight?
PIRATE. I made it seventy-one, but I expect you're right.
OLIVER. Then you've seventy-two thousand pieces altogether?
JILL. And he's going to polish up the four-pounder until I can see my face in it.
OLIVER. I was just going to ask you about your guns. You've got 'em fore and aft of course?
PIRATE. Yes, sir. A four-pounder fore and a half-pounder haft.
OLIVER (a little embarrassed). And do you ever have brothers-in-law in your ship?
PIRATE. Well, I never have had yet, but I have always been looking about for one.
JILL. Oh, Oliver, isn't Eric a _nice_ man?
OLIVER (casually). I suppose the captain's brother-in-law is generally the first man to board the Spaniard with his cutlass between his teeth?