Oh! how these words do pierce me to the heart! Romanus lately told me of his plan: I was to carry out the work myself Not as thy partner but without thine aid. In this event, he was prepared to use All that he had to succour Hilary. When I declared that I could ne'er consent To separate the work from out thy group, He answered that in that case it would be In vain to make more effort. He it is Who backs the opposition to my work, Which Hilary's companion offereth. Without these plans my life must worthless seem. Since these two men have torn away from me My field of action, all that I can see Ahead is life reft of the breath of life. In order that my spirit may not show Discouragement I need that bravery Of which thou spak'st just now. But whether I Shall find my strength sufficient for the task Is more than I can say, for I can feel How that same force which I must needs set free Will likewise work on me distinctively.
Maria and Johannes have just made Advances in clairvoyance; and the things Which hindered them from bridging o'er the gap Between the mystic life and world of sense Are no more there, and in the course of time Aims will appear in which both thou and they Can take part jointly. 'Tis not guidance, but Creative strength that flows from mystic words: 'For that which must will surely come to pass.' And so in wakefulness we must await The way in which the spirit sends the signs.
A vision came to me not long ago Which I must hold to be a sign from fate. I was aboard a ship, thou at the helm, The labouring oars were under my command; And we were bearing to their place of work Maria and Johannes; there appeared Another ship quite close to us; on board Romanus and the friend of Hilary-- They lay across our course as enemies. I battled with them;--as the fight went on Lo! Ahriman stood by their side to help. While I was bitterly engaged with him Came Theodora to my side, in aid, And then the vision vanished from my sight. I dared to say once to Capesius And Felix that I could with ease endure The opposition which now menaceth My work from outward sources e'en if all My plans were ruined--I should stand upright. Suppose that picture now should show to me That outward opposition doth imply An inward fight--a fight with Ahriman; Am I well armoured also for this fight?